Megan Fox is beginning her promotional tour in Europe for Jennifer’s Body

Jesus. Has anyone told this girl, “Before you answer a question, just stop and think about the words you are about to say. Just think about what it sounds like.” Because this sounds like Megan wants to teach little girls how to act sexy. No, thanks, Megan. You’re not Miley Cyrus! Besides that, I think the reason Megan thinks “sexiness” is power is because that’s all she’s got. Just FYI, to all young girls out there - intelligence, education, self-respect, grace, humor, talent, compassion and humility are also pretty powerful weapons in the arsenal of modern womanhood too.

In this interview, Megan loses the graciousness she had at the Scream Awards, and instead snots out this gem: “This is a bull—- industry and I made a decision not to be a bull—- person. I need to hold onto my soul and my integrity and I can’t compromise that.” Right. Because whenever I hear the word “integrity”, Megan’s face always floats up.

Earlier this year, her comments to a magazine journalist that Michael Bay, who directed her in the two Transformers movies, is “like Hitler” on his sets prompted an angry response from three crew members who called her “dumb as a rock”, before going on to dismiss her as “thankless, classless, graceless [and] unfriendly”.

Fox shrugs off the criticism, when I meet her in Toronto – where her new movie, the demonic-possession horror-comedy Jennifer’s Body is getting its world premiere. “I’ve definitely said some things that I shouldn’t say,” she admits. “I sometimes forget how things will translate once they are in print. But this is a bull—- industry and I made a decision not to be a bull—- person. I need to hold onto my soul and my integrity and I can’t compromise that.”

“It was a difficult movie to make because I was under a lot of pressure to do Diablo’s script justice,” says Fox, “so I was nervous about that. I was always questioning myself and trying to bring some real elements to Jennifer. I wanted people to feel empathy for her; I wanted her to be a real person, and not a caricature, like some of the characters I may have played in the past.”

Asked what she makes of the “Sexiest Woman in the World” label, Fox laughs. “I don’t take any notice of those polls. I take it with a grain of salt. I think that because I was in a movie [Transformers] that made $800 million, they threw me on the top of the list.” But what about her remark to Esquire that “I’m just really confident sexually and I think that sort of oozes out of my pores?”

She sighs. “Sometimes I say things that I think are obviously sarcastic and people take them quite literally. In America we’re still very uptight about sexuality: it’s considered scandalous for women to be sexual or speak about sex in a humorous way,” she says.

“For some reason it makes people very uncomfortable, possibly because our society is still very tied to archaic biblical principles that we try to force on each other and force on our children. It’s very unfortunate because men are embraced for their sexual prowess and women discouraged from it.”

“In Europe, women are celebrated for their sexuality and appreciated for it. There you can still be both sexy and intelligent. Go figure.”

While another actress might bemoan the fact that being named the sexiest woman alive would hinder her goal of becoming “A Serious Actress”, Fox says: “I didn’t decide I’m going to be an actress because I want to be respected for how I play chess. I don’t think men approach me for intellectual conversation. I’m definitely labelled in the pin-up category and I haven’t given people a reason to take my work seriously yet.”

In the past, Fox has been outspoken about being bisexual and having had an affair with a stripper while in her teens. But, for the past five years, she has been in a monogamous relationship with actor Brian Austin Green, who is 13 years her senior.

When discussing Green, Fox suddenly, unexpectedly, begins to cry; then she dabs her eyes with a tissue, smiles and apologises. “Man, I just get emotional,” she says. You don’t come across a lot of genuine people in this industry and I feel blessed to have someone who will stick around through my bull—-”

“I just really want it at some point to be OK for women and young girls to be sexy because I think that’s a power, a gift that we were given by God or the universe or whatever,” she says. “I think I’m a different kind of role model for young girls.” She thinks for a minute and adds with a smile: “But maybe not the kind America is comfortable with.”

Britney Spears has cleaned up her act

Damn, I could use some corn chips right now. Is it wrong that I want corn chips for breakfast? It is, isn’t it? Before, I could always look at my food choices with some smugness, thinking to myself “Well, at least I’m eating better than Britney Spears.” No more! She does look really cute these days. Let’s hope that Britney didn’t just quit junk food, she quit the pink wig and all that it represents.

Britney Spears has cleaned up her act. GK Reid, who recently styled the music video shoot for her hit new single, “3,” tells us, “She exhibited amazing energy and was in great shape — her body looked better than it has in years.”

“She munched on sushi instead of junk food, and even sang live with the words. She worked really hard and was really sweet to all the dancers.”

Says Reid of the video, which is an ode to threesomes: “It’s really steamy.”

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Lindsay Lohan showed up in court today with her lawyer

Here's Lindsay Lohan appearing in court today after it was revealed she failed to complete the alcohol education classes required for her probation. She almost reminds me of Lara Flynn Boyle on The Practice if Lara Flynn Boyle bathed in coke and had the acting skills of a tit mouse.



I'm only kidding, Lindsay. Arching your eyebrow totally has everyone convinced you're paying attention and not at all thinking about delicious gin.



Lindsay Lohan has a shockingly long history of deciding that the laws don’t apply to her. From stealing cars and running over people’s feet, to stealing jewelry and clothing, to racking up multiple DUIs, there’s little Lohan hasn’t done. I don’t think she’s actually killed anyone yet, but given her moral character, I’d wager it’ll happen in the next ten years. Not only do laws not apply to Lohan, but the consequences obviously don’t either.




This morning she was due in court to explain why she’s violated the terms of her 2007 DUI probation by refusing to complete her alcohol education class. Keep in mind, Lindsay’s choice was to take the class or go to jail. She’s had two years. You’d think even a lazy ass like her could pull it together. But why bother when the rules don’t apply to her? TMZ has a summary of what went down at the trial, and needless to say, justice was neither certain nor swift.

Megan Fox has been named the newest crotch of Armani underwear

I know I talk a lot of smack about Megan Fox (mostly about how much I want to smack her) but I don’t think this is a horrible hire for Armani. While I think Megan has jacked her face through extensive plastic surgery, her body is pretty great, and she’ll probably be a good underwear model and increase Armani sales. Meanwhile, Cristiano isn’t really a household name in America - but I’m sure Armani wants him mostly for his international name recognition.



Interesting side note - a few months ago, the rumor was that Posh was going to be replaced by Angelina Jolie, who would “costar” in ads with David. David’s response to that was hilariously cryptic: “You know she wouldn’t do it and I wouldn’t do it. At the end of the day, I wouldn’t do it because I’m married.” Because doing underwear ads = affair, right Goldenballs? Anyway, it’s interesting to me because Angelina was the rumored crotch first, but they ended up with Megan. Fascinating.



Megan Fox has been named the newest crotch of Armani underwear, replacing Victoria Beckham. This follows last week’s news that David Beckham’s big, black, bulging crotch was going to be replaced by Cristiano Ronaldo. So, Beckhams out, and Megan and Cristiano are in. Except that they aren’t going to be starring in bizarre, sketchy ads together, like Posh and Becks did. No, Megan’s crotch will be appearing in January, solo.

Lindsay Lohan says

Overall the article does make me feel badly for Lohan, though that is clearly not its purpose. You have to read the thing in its entirety to really get the feeling that this does matter to Lindsay and she does believe in herself. And it makes me feel like a total bitch to be like, “Yeah, but you shouldn’t.” But… um… yeah, but you shouldn’t. How else do you put it? She did a terrible, terrible job. As excited as she was for the perks and the prestige, she was still trying to do a lot of it with faxes and email. I do think she has an eye for fashion, but it’s too hit-and-miss. She gets most of the credit for bringing back the legging (or blame, depending on your opinion). But most of her outfits look like she rolled out of bed and didn’t just put on the first thing she found, but actually rummaged around for the dirties combo she could come up with.



Lohan barely talks about acting throughout the interview, with the exception of that last paragraph about acting being monotonous, and a mention that she has to go back to the U.S. to finish filming something. It seems like she’s over the movie business, and that’s probably a good thing because the movie business is over her, too. But she still has a long way to go before she’ll get any credit in the fashion industry.



The Ungaro PR at the headquarters on the chi-chi Avenue Montaigne throws me a triumphant look. For ten days I had been glumly anticipating the hours I’d have to wait for Lohan not to show up, reliability not being her forte. Sure enough, the previous day’s interviews had all been cancelled, but then the PR sat her down and explained why it probably wasn’t a good idea to snub International Herald Tribune and The New York Times two days before showing your first collection on a Paris catwalk in front of A Very Sceptical audience, and Lohan apparently said: “Oh, OK then, tomorrow I’ll be on time.” And here she is, very slim (but not too skinny) in a pair of black leather leggings from her own range, a white T-shirt, black Alaïa bootees, scraped-back hair peroxided for a film she’s shooting — a very, very pretty face, but one with a lived in quality that makes her look much older than her 23 years

…Although today there are paparazzi camped outside the Plaza Athénée, where she is staying, she says they’re not always there. She can get privacy when she wants it and she says she tunes out most of the negative press. “I just don’t read it any more. I don’t go on the net. They want a car crash, which doesn’t make me want to give it to them, but nor am I going to stop myself from doing things that other girls my age would do. Of course I regret some of them. But the media now is so unhealthy. It’s like they’re waiting to devour you.”… Yup. I’d say the reviews of the Ungaro collection pretty much devoured and spat her out.

…Ungaro is part of France’s couture heritage. Why did Mounir Moufarrige, Ungaro’s urbane, Lebanese-born owner, not fill the vacant position Ungaro left when he bowed out five years ago with a highly trained designer instead of an actress with a reputation for getting high… In fact, as Moufarrige stoically recites, there were several highly trained designers shoe-horned into the top post after Ungaro’s departure and all lost him a lot of money. “I couldn’t get a single journalist interested in this house for three years. Now look! They all want to come and see her.”



That Lohan really wanted this gig is clear. She says she screamed with happiness when she finally got it, because Moufarrige didn’t just hand it to her. She turned up to their first meeting with 15 outfits she had rough sketched and then had worked into finished illustrations by a professional artist. Then Moufarrige asked her how much time she could give the label and how much more time she was planning on spending in prison [in 2007 she was convicted of cocaine possession, and driving under the influence, and incarcerated for 84 entire minutes]. She laughed and told him she’d have to see how much time she could afford to spend there. “Then I cried when I saw my office. It’s got TWO balconies overlooking the Eiffel Tower.”



“It’s not as if I have a five-year plan,” she says, “but I really think that with [co-designer] Estrella [Archs], who is amazing technically, we can do this with faxes and e-mail.

… “I never felt pushed into acting. Even though it can get a bit monotonous always being on set [although strictly speaking, she hasn’t always been on set, hence some of her problems]. But the thing is, I never had acting lessons. I panic sometimes when I have a monologue but then weirdly I look at the lines and they just attach themselves to my memory… But, you know, this,” she says, surveying the sequins and the orange ruched leggings and the jackets hanging on the rails, “is what I really love.”

Jessica Simpson’s dad "she looks heavier due"

Notice that even when Papa Joe is trying to make a larger point about both of his daughters, he always has to bring the conversation around to just Jessica? Yeah. Sometimes I really feel for Ashlee - it must suck for her in that family. Oh, and it was her 25th birthday on Saturday - she had a big party in Vegas. I can’t find any pictures of her dad at Ashlee’s birthday - but he was all over the Operation Smile gala.

Operation Smile has been one of Jessica’s causes for several years - I’m proud of her for sticking with it, even if she’s (maybe) not the most coherent advocate. I think her heart’s in it, though, and the organization does great work. According to its website, “Operation Smile volunteers have treated more than 130,000 children born with cleft lips, cleft palates and other facial deformities and the organization has a presence in 51 countries. In addition to contributing free medical treatment, Operation Smile trains local medical professionals in its partner countries and leaves behind crucial equipment to lay the groundwork for long-term self-sufficiency.” Good for Jessica!

“She’s always scrutinized by the world and [it's great] to watch her go to other countries and see women talk about what is beautiful there,” he told Us Friday at a gala in Beverly Hills for the international charity Operation Smile. “We were just in Uganda, and a beauty ambassador [there] knew Jessica’s total story about her weight and blah, blah, blah. [She said] to Jessica that it’s about who you are inside, which is the message of our show.”

Asked if he has given his daughter, 29, any advice on how to handle the weight issue, Joe told Us, “I don’t have to tell her anything anymore. She’s wise.”

He said he also brushes off any criticism aimed at Jessica or his other daughter Ashlee.

“The girls are wonderful kids who have so much to offer, and as a father, the greatest frustration in the world is that people are told who they are instead of knowing who they are,” he said. “So the hardest thing for me as a parent is to say that’s not who my child is; you don’t know the girl because she’s the same girl she’s always been. She’s with children in Uganda or children in Japan or Thailand — she has an open heart and loves these people. I think you’ll see that on our show. I think it’s the greatest show that women can experience because it’s all women all around the world talking about beauty and the message is always the same: It starts inside.”

What can viewers expect?

Jessica “becomes a Geisha in Japan,” Joe told Us. “In Uganda, we sat in a fattening hut because, in Uganda … fat is beautiful. So the bigger you are, the more beautiful you are. She was with a girl who had been in a hut preparing for her wedding for two months and 25 days on a 5,000 calorie-a-day diet.”

Next stop: Morocco.

“It’s going to be beautiful,” he said.

Jessica agreed, telling Us, “It’s going to be amazing … we’re leaving the day after tomorrow I think.”